Life...

I know that life isn't supposed to be perfect...I know that trials will come, and that God uses them for His greater purpose...but what can come from this? What can come from 9 years of turmoil in my relationship with my dad?

I thought it would be better now, now that I am almost 21 (in 3 days!)...now that I am a senior in college...now that I have proved that I am responsible and capable of taking care of myself...yet it never ends...I cannot do anything right, and everything that I try to do to please him is never enough. I cannot but fail. Without going into detail, tonight was a really bad night...I never cry--seriously--and I definitely cried tonight...I just want to be loved for who I am...by my father...

Other news: I won a dollar in the lottery yesterday! Not exactly $61 million, but at least I only lost $1!

Tomorrow is a new day...Lamentations 3:21-23